parishiltonsexslave:

me when writing an essay

chibisokka:

reblog if you ARE gay, if you SUPPORT gays, or if you like to OPEN people’s WINDOWS in the middle of the NIGHT and put DOZENS of GEESE in their BEDROOMS

Misfits RewatchSeason 1, Episode 3.

If a bear and a shark had a fight, who would win?

What do you think makes you so driven? 

I’m not sure I know, but having been an obedient and nerdy kid, I’m very driven to receive praise. If I were a smarter person, I’d be driven to receive money. I’m a dope—all I want is, “That was real good. Looks like you guys worked real hard on that.” It’s always parent-teacher conference day in my mind.

peperomint:

me: *eating microwaved ramen noodles and watching kitchen nightmares* cannot believe this asshole didnt use fresh chicken in his paella, unbelievable

nbcsnl:

Kristen Wiig, Andy Samberg & Bill Hader - Saturday Night Live

Well, this is the coolest.

insidevladimir:

“At some point, I figured that it would be more effective and far funnier to embrace the ugliest, most terrifying things in the world—the Holocaust, racism, rape, et cetera. But for the sake of comedy, and the comedian’s personal sanity, this requires a certain emotional distance. It’s akin to being a shrink or a social worker. you might think that the most sensitive, empathetic person would make the best social worker, but that person would end up being soup on the floor. It really takes someone strong—someone, dare I say, with a big fat wall up—to work in a pool of heartbreak all day and not want to fucking kill yourself. But adopting a persona at once ignorant and arrogant allowed me to say what I didn’t mean, even preach the opposite of what I believed. For me, it was a funny way to be sincere. And like the jokes in a roast, the hope is that the genuine sentiment—maybe even a goodness underneath the joke (however brutal) transcends.”
- Sarah Kate Silverman

CAYLO